A New Re-Start

When I launched this blog I was hoping it would be about my new life as a completely new person who has it all figured out. The purpose of the blog is to help other people figure out how to live a more complete and sober free healthy lifestyle like me. But I was extremely motivated for a variety of reasons last year that were driving me to live that way. Now that I am approaching year two, I find I am struggling to maintain that same drive. The last thing I want to be is a hypocrite and a failure.

Last year I gave up drinking and immediately went on a 5 to 6 day a week hot yoga and healthy eating lifestyle. This helped me tremendously with loosing weight and feel mentally strong. I lost about 40+ pounds and felt great! I had mental clarity and goals I wanted to achieve. But for some reason, I couldn’t maintain this lifestyle it slowly started to slip away.

I ask myself, where and why did it go wrong? Last year, around October 2015, I hurt my shoulder. My “balls to the wall” yoga ended me up in the ER. I suddenly had calcium tinnitus in my shoulder. The doctor explained I probably had a previous shoulder injury and the calcium decided to deposit in the tear in my muscle, which then got inflamed resulting in the most excruciating pain of my life! After a huge syringe was inserted into my shoulder delivering steroids to help the pain, it took months to get the movement back in my shoulder. This injury soon resulted in my weight gain, because I wasn’t able to participate in Yoga any longer and began to live a sedentary lifestyle and over eating.

I am the type of person that is either balls to the wall 100 percent All IN or NOT IN at zero percent. I have a hard time with hanging in the middle at a balanced life. “A little bit of this, a little bit of that” turns into “a lot of this and a lot of that!”

The strange thing is, I thought when I stopped drinking that this alone was going to help me loose weight. Initially I think it did, but not for the reasons I thought. When I gave up drinking I was no longer hung over, which enabled me to work out. I had more energy and I wasn’t going out at all to happy hour or drinking events so I would work out instead.

Now that almost all of the weight is back, and I am in a “slump,” I am beginning to think it isn’t just the drinking that leads me to an unhealthy way of life. Drinking doesn’t help, but it isn’t just the alcohol, it is depression. Several years ago I was diagnosed with mild depression and PTS. I will write about my diagnosis another time. I thought that the temporary depression I experience is now more of a serious issue. The alcohol I was drinking was only “medicating” the underlying depression that I have from time to time. I have now discovered that excessive alcohol use and depression can go hand in hand. The scariest part is now that I don’t drink excessively; I don’t have anything to numb the pain.

Now that I have some clarity of what is going on with me, I can now write about it and hopefully you can relate and we can get through it together.

Namaste

A new day, a new year and a new life!

“One year from this very day, your life is going to be better or worse than it is right now today; it won’t be the same.  And whether it’s worse, whether you made progress or fallen back is going to be a function of the choices you make between now and then.”  (Quote from Dr. Phil website)

Wow, my first post.  It took me a long time to decide how to start.  I saw this quote about two weeks ago and decided this was it!  Over a year ago, my life wasn’t exactly going how I wanted it to and I needed to make a drastic change.

August of 2014 was a challenging time because of some poor decisions I made.  January of 2015 became a year with positive self-growth and I am not done!  I want to share my journey with you, which is why I started this blog.

My goal for this blog is to help people work through and overcome obstacles they are facing with drinking and other challenges that might not be healthy.  I also want to educate the public about the importance of “know your number.” I learned just how many drinks I could have and how it affects my body.  I also learned a very important lesson about having a plan before I go out so that I ABSOLUTELY DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE.

Addiction is a strong word.  I looked up a few definitions and thought long and hard about where I fall in the spectrum.  I was not diagnosed from a counselor as an alcoholic however; I was told by a counselor that I was borderline and could benefit from treatment.  That scared me so I decided to learn more about addiction.

Here are a few definitions of addiction that I found online:

Webster’s Dictionary-“The fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity.  Dependency, dependence, habit, problem.  Devotion, dedication to, obsession with, infatuation with, passion for, love of mania for.  A strong and harmful need to regularly have something (such as a drug) or do something (such as gamble)”

Well, these definitions of addiction apply to several areas of my life including being a former addict to sugar, tanning and lip balm!  *Quick tip to naturally overcome addiction to lip balm.  Try olive oil.  Put a few drops of olive oil on your fingertip and massage it gently on and around your lips.  It might take a couple of days to get your lips to detox from lip balm but keep at it.  Take it with you in a small container and when you feel the urge, use the olive oil.  Remember to massage it in.  I had some dry skin on my lip, which naturally exfoliated when I massaged it in for a minute or two.

After limiting my drinking last year and working through my “addiction” to sugar, I am happy to report I lost 40 pounds.  My thinking is clearer, I have more energy and I just feel better all around.

Welcome to my blog and I hope you enjoy reading about my journey into a healthier lifestyle, body, mind and soul.